Sunday, February 22, 2009

Reunited...at last..

Dreamy youth....three decade past...
Recently, a few days ago Rashmi my cousin had come home. She had a carry bag full of newly bought kannada books. Out of curiosity I just went through the books quite literally assorted books which also contained anthologies of Jayant kaikini published by ankita publications. without my
knowledge my hands picked the books of Jayanth and like a reflex action my eyes started focusing on the poems. Rashmi personally told me that I would have the books with me till I complete the reading of the poems as she knew that I had an intimate and a sentimental attachment with jayant. But I wondered at the sensitivity of Rashmi as indeed I had tried to suppress my curiosity and urgency of going through the whole book that night itself. But yet she could see my anxiety and restlessness and offered her help.


Present reality.....united at last...

It is not that I am a voracious reader or a great lover of literature or poetry, but I am a moderately interested person who could enjoy any kind of art but only on recommendation or insistence or the reviews which normally I go through before start reading any kind of book in any language…Sorry don’t get me wrong..! I only know kannada and English and can understand and appreciate Hindi also to some extent. What I meant to say is that I can appreciate any form of art in any language, that is to say music, sculptures, paintings etc.
So…. .what is the reason behind my over enthusiasm of reading his poems?. It is quite inexplicable…you are just lost in the nostalgic moments spent quite long ago when we ourselves were dreamers and theoretical ideologies with all possible isms of the world…and when you were feeling the world cannot even continue without you, when you were romancing with even death, when nothing matters except you and your dreams and the best persons of the world were your friends you thought,.. the zeal of life so magical, when love was everything, the selfishness was beyond comprehension, when great people haunt you in your spirit and body, when you were not yourself, death nowhere near you, when your body was at your command, when hunger was a fashion, when simplicity was a passion, and when you share your self with likeminded characters living and sharing….when every words sounded were musical…A state of indifferent audacity with delicate but honestly a youthfulness unquestioned and lived every split seconds!
but unexpectedly the reality of your life takes a different turn in a cliff of the steep valley of life, and you are forced to leave your dreamy world and headed directly to face the unknown and unavoidable peak of real life… you depart… time doesn’t stand still!!!! It ticks to its rhythmic angles of your kith and kins?? …destiny waits for you… Very soon you are under the intoxication of family responsibilities but still with your ideas intact… but slowly that becomes an addiction and you enter the real world of limitations, your incapability stares at you, cut throat competition laughs at you…
and finally you become a loner and stand alone naked in the unending path of life….time never stops… and suddenly you find you have lost everything… you console and comfort yourself saying that there is time left before I could complete the present responsibility.. and time moves on.. and your studentship of life begins then…!! All of a sudden you realize to your shocking dismay that you have become an old man…..you have missed the bus! But dreams and aims never grow old… instead when life is relaxed you start missing every ounce of your enthusiasm of your spent days…. you look back in nostalgic repentance or satisfaction…? yet in reality you crave….
woods are lovely dark and deep,
but I have promises to keep,
miles to go before I sleep…
miles to go before I sleep…

you reassure yourself, to walk again upright… you want your long departed loved ones with their goals achieved to join you and dream again…but… with so much of unbridgeable gap, have they become unreachable…? the idea shudders and you shake violently hoping the dreams to get back…
but terribly frighten of being discarded or neglected!! with whom you had built the empire of your own world..
And now you are too far apart with that one of your few loved companions, once geographically distant and now due to our preoccupied and unavoidably restricted work field and incapability to adjust to the increasingly dangerous traffic jam of life…..but it is an unforgettable relation where you are forced to remember countless times of your sweet memories in peculiar environments…. and look….
quite unexpectedly out of the blue…… there…. he is in front of you! talking to you and touching you and you are dumb and numb to react in anyway…for a fraction of cosmic existence the time was frozen and I was not there…when today I heard the voice of my old beloved friend jayanth I had forgotten the time and space… the very bottom of my heart and mind…..is stirred… and I am frozen……















5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good one! Keep up the good work.
-shama

Anonymous said...

Makes a good reading because it is a real experience of the writer. It is really wonderful and exemplery character of Mr jayanth to receive his friend without ego shows his extra ordinary character which is nowadays a rarest commadities.We also crave to have such friends of celebrity character in our life. but unfortunately only we could become fans.With little name and fame people change so much but sri jayanta kaikinis remains the same good old buddy of the writer.Hats off to his terrific human nature.And also compliments to sheshagiri for his simple and honest confession type of narration(That is what exactly makes the writing readable}in his story.Really I am moved beyond expression and envy such wonderful friendship of these two soul,specially Jayanth SIR..

Anonymous said...
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sheshagiri jodidar said...
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Anonymous said...

it is too bad.

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